No Trouble for Foul: The Untold Story of book 1
by Spectra16
Summary: The story that J.K. Rowling left out! A few first years lives can't be complete with making Snape's a living hell. Several OC's, but plenty of Harry and Ron. Meet Caspian, Lawrence, Lara and Twiggy. Substitute teachers wreak havoc. They protest for better
1. The Only London Train That Leaves One Ti

**No Trouble For Foul: The Untold Story of Sorcerer's Stone**

_By the elusive Spectra16_

A/N: Heh. You might hate me for this, but I only just read the first Harry Potter book, and decided to write a fan fiction about my experience. I had no interest to read it back when it first came out. But now I have, and I hope you will give me credit for that. Most of the characters this story is about is my OC's and their lives in Hogwarts. Of course, Harry and friends will be appearing frequently, but this story isn't about them.

Disclaimer: Most of the Snapery (mischievous actions against Severus, Snapery for short) will have been taken from "345 Ways To Piss Off Snape" from So if you notice that and call me a loser for stealing them, then I'm sorry. I obviously won't use all of them, and I'll probably make up some myself. Oh yeah, and I don't own Harry Potter. We already knew that, though.

Also, some of the OC's will be based on people I know. The most dead obvious one (at least to my friends that are reading this) will be a substitute teacher by the name of Mr. Monarski. He's a substitute teacher in real life. Also, there will be a boy named Twiggy, that is also based on a guy I used to know, named Twiggy. And a girl named Caspian will be in this story, based on a fan fiction writer named Caspian Nyghtvision. There will also be another girl who is based on Osaka from Azumanga Daioh. If you don't know what that is, look it up on google. I promise you happiness. Gave credit where credit is due.

* * *

Chapter One: The Only London Train That Leaves On Time

The Hogwarts Express was pretty much the only train in London that ever left on time. It was a magically bright red train that went directly to one of the most desired places on Earth; Hogwarts. Hogwarts is a school that teaches magic. And as strange as that concept is to someone who has lived their life as a Muggle, the first year students were no less than excited. Well, every student except Dan Seffron, whose parents were both wizards in the Ravenclaw house, and expected no less from their only son. Before he was born, they had hoped he would be a star in the Quidditch team, but looking at him now, that was the last thing you'd think of. His body is slender and pale from many hours in seclusion of his room. He did not like to play outside, nor did he like sunlight. His hair did not help his gloomy complexion, for it looked greasy and black, pulled down over his eyes. It was longer than most boy cuts. Barely passed his eyes.

Dan's equipment for Hogwarts was bundled close to him on the last seat in the car he was in. He quietly watched the other students talk busily. He figured making friends wouldn't be very easy, the way it had always been. The reason for his loner ways could've been because he just didn't care about anything. His parents found that he had very little interest for anything. When tested, they found that depression wasn't a factor in his apathy. Dan just showed little emotion. The way he had been born.

Dan was pulled from his daydream when a certain hyper active girl stood up on the seat a few rows in front of him.

"Everyone listen! I just came from the bathroom and heard that Harry Potter's on the train!" Her robe was already on, proudly showing off her Gryffindor insignia. Her hair was curled closely to her face and she had a cute complexion. Dan suddenly had interest in the girl and her news. _Harry Potter? The boy that survived Voldemort? That's incredible. He must be my age_, Dan pondered. He felt a short spark of interest to meet this boy. _Or could this be an untruth?_

Before Caspian Clinton left her stance on the train seat, she looked around at the new attendants of her favorite place on earth. She saw that everyone was busily gossiping about the lucky boy, except a certain strange looking boy that sat in back. She titled her head while looking at him, realizing he resembled someone… She stepped down from the seat, symbolizing the fact that she would be second best in the Gryffindor house, almost knowing that Harry Potter would be chosen as Gryffindor. Caspian walked slowly to the dark first year and sat next to him. His gaze didn't pull away from the window. She looked at him intently and poked him once. He turned to look at her. Caspian almost shivered from his dark eyes._ Snape_, she thought. She remembered her reason for sitting next to him.

"Hey, what's your name? You look like a first year," Caspian smiled, only so that he wouldn't get the wrong idea.

"Why do I look like a first year?" he looked down at what he was wearing. His robe still remained in his bag. He wore a black turtleneck sweater and jeans.

"You're not wearing your robe. I mean, I'd understand that if you were a Slytherin, but even they seem to be proud of their house," Caspian joked, but Dan didn't laugh.

"Oh no. You are a Slytherin," She covered her mouth with one hand. He cracked a weak smile.

"No. I am a first year," Dan said reluctantly. Caspian nodded.

"So what's your name?" Caspian asked curiously. Dan politely tried to brush her off.

"Twiggy," He said. Caspian suppressed a laugh.

"Is that your nickname?" Caspian asked and smiled widely. Dan felt a little like she cared.

"Yeah. It's been my nickname since 3rd grade," Dan looked down at his lap.

"And you still want it? You could've gotten rid of it by coming to a school with new people," Caspian stated the obvious. Dan shrugged.

"It's kinda grown on me," Dan admitted. Caspian nodded and smiled at him.

-.-.-.-.-

Harry and Ron sat together, feasting on Bertie Bots and eating chocolate frogs. The whole car was in whisper, knowing who's presence they were in. Lara Von Stellano and Lawrence Petkovski were in part of those whispers, also being first years.

"This is exciting! I hope I'm in his house! Maybe we'll be friends! Wouldn't that be cool?" Lara pulled her robe over her head. Lawrence grimaced.

"He looks like a total dork. Typical of Voldemort. Have pity on the less fortunate," Lawrence joked. Lara put her index finger to her lips and shushed him.

"How dare you say the name of you-know-who! Have you no shame?" Lara became concerned for her new found friend.

"It's been too long to fear him now. I happen to believe the crock pot is dead. If he went all soft on killing Potter, why should I fear him?" Lawrence puffed out his chest, seeming ignorant. Lara sighed.

"Well, don't come crying to me if he miraculously shows up and destroys us all!" Lara listlessly.

-.-.-.-.-

"You're just going to love Hogwarts. Everything there will be sure to keep you busy. Life will never be the same-," Caspian stopped. Curiously, Twiggy had quickly fallen asleep, and was not leaned up against the window. Caspian felt a tad embarrassed, but focused her attention on what to do while he was sleeping. She decided to look for her long time crush, Percy Weasley. It was his last year, and she'd be sad to see him leave. This year was her last chance to let him know that he was the only man for her. She left her messenger bag with Twiggy, and ran off to find him.

Twiggy awoke to the bustle of students walking off the train. He jerked up, looking for Caspian, but she wasn't sitting next to him any longer. All of a sudden, she ran into the cab and swiped her pack off of the ground. Twiggy smiled at the sight of her and she signaled him to come with her hand.

"Hurry up! This is our stop!" She said melodramatically. He followed closely as several red headed boys came from behind him. He looked back at their ecstatic nature and saw a boy with a scar on his forehead, closely following behind them.

"Ron, now when we get off the train, don't embarrass me with your "I miss mommy" stuff," one of the boys said. Another laughed. Ron, seeming to be the youngest one, narrowed his eyes. Twiggy scurried after Caspian.

The air seemed clear and crisp, and wonder filled his mind. Nothing seemed the same. Caspian was careful to keep a close eye on Twiggy. She felt it a courteous thing to help out first years. Eventually, every one learns about the pros and cons to Hogwarts, but a helpful boost can always make the whole experience more enjoyable. Sometimes it takes a helpful upper classman to aid you on your first day. Caspian thought of only Percy.

Hangrid lead the students to small boats to cross a river to Hogwarts. The first years stood in awe of it's majesty, and some of the second years did as well, forgetting the past. Percy and Fred got in a boat with Caspian and Twiggy. Twiggy looked around the area. By far, the school grabbed his attention the most.

"Have you met Harry Potter yet?" Caspian enthusiastically asked Percy. Percy and Fred nodded.

"Our youngest brother, Ron, seems to have been talking with him the whole ride here. Apparently, he knows absolutely nothing! Not even about Quidditch!" Percy seemed rather shocked. Caspian giggled. Percy paused, admiring her laughter, and then thought of something.

"Hey, do you still have lucky Rammstein?" Percy asked her, spotting her bag. Caspian's nose twitched.

"Of course I do! Here," She opened her bag and pulled out a clear bag. Twiggy became interested.

"Rammstein? Isn't that a band?" He asked quietly, as if the upper classmen would yell at him for speaking out.

"Yeah. I named him that because whenever I play Rammstein, he pretends to be dead," Caspian had a goldfish in the clear bag. It seemed happy as if opened and closed it's mouth. Twiggy quirked an eyebrow at the poor fish. Percy looked at Twiggy.

"What animal did you bring?" He asked Twiggy. Twiggy bit his lip.

"My family is going to send me an owl for my birthday in a week," He said quietly. Percy chuckled.

"Their going to owl you an owl! Heh," He laughed a little.

The four of them stepped into the vast school. Twiggy was taken by the expanse. It was beautiful. A few boys brushed by him in a snide manner. Caspian glared at them, almost immediately knowing they would be Slytherins. She had a good eye for who belonged in what house. The boy in the middle had his blonde hair slicked back and stood arrogantly. Two other boys walked at his heels, as if whipped, rabid dogs for him to send off. Caspian muttered under her breath, "Malfoy", but Twiggy didn't quite hear her. The group of students walked forward to the start-of-term banquet. Professor McGonagall was talking, but only the first years were listening.

Everyone sat down to the feast. There were few common foods missing from the banquet, and it made some first years wonder who cooked it all. There were cakes and turkey, mashed potatoes, and ham. Some students didn't know where to begin. Dumbledore, whom everyone knew, gave his speeches, and allowed the students to finish their meals. During the choosing of the houses, Twiggy noticed that Caspian guessed almost everyone's house correct. Except his own.

She pushed him to the hat and whispered in his ear.

"Don't worry. You're a raven claw," She said excitedly. But the hat declared something else.

"SLYTHERIN!" It yelled. Twiggy's jaw hung open as the Slytherin table cheered and clapped. He felt betrayed. His family would look down on this mishap. He felt sadden by this event. Caspian exclaimed, "What!" loudly, but only the people nearest to her (that knew she was good at guessing) heard her. Twiggy walked over to the Slytherin table and sat down.

Caspian halfheartedly invited Harry, Hermione, Ron, Neville, Lawrence and Lara (just to name a few) to the Gryffindor table. Throughout the rest of the meal, she sat across from Twiggy, wondering what the hat saw in him that she didn't. Percy sat closely next to her, but she didn't seem to care.

"Hey, Cap," Percy nudged Caspian.

"Hmm?" She didn't take her gaze off of Twiggy.

"This is my last year, so my brother's and I decided to do something really extravagant. You know, so that no one will forget me," Percy began. Caspian turned to face him.

"Okay," She expected him to go on.

"We're going to REALLY piss Snape off," He suppressed a wide smile.

"You mean, more than usual?" She asked sarcastically. Percy nodded.

"Like unusually more," Percy said and his brothers Fred and George snickered behind him. Caspian nodded.

"So you want me to help?" She asked.

"Yes. We don't care about our house points this year. We're going out with a bang," Percy smirked. He pulled a list made of parchment from his sack. It was titled, "365 Ways To Piss Off Professor Snape". Caspian's eyes opened wide and she giggled.

"This took me all summer to write. I figured five years of studying this stuff should make me an expert," Percy waved it around. She looked at the first one.

_1. Learn a charm that gives it's unsuspecting victim a large, fluffy, white rabbit's tail. For a week. Put it to good use._

_2. Tell him you've lost your pet werewolf and has he seen it?_

_3. Scatter rose-petals in front of him wherever he goes._

_Percy snatched the list and stuffed it in his robe._

"I'll let you memorize these or copy them down later. We can't risk him or anyone seeing this right now," Percy was filled with excitement and anticipation. His brothers and Caspian were also quite enthusiastic about the idea.

"This is going to be one very interesting year," She smirked.


	2. Ten Points To Professor Snape!

**No Trouble For Foul: The Untold Story of Sorcerer's Stone**

By Spectra16

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. It was kinda slow. It'll pick up in this chapter though, I promise. Snape gets bashed so bad. But don't get me wrong. I'm a die hard fan.

In this chapter, you will meet two OC teachers of Hogwarts. One is a substitute and one is a normal teacher. So if I scratch an original teacher off, don't be angry. It happens.

Someone mentioned Percy is out of character. Sorry, but he's a Weasley! There's no way he acts good ALL of the time!

Also, this story is forming a soundtrack, just like my other stories. Listen to "Pure Imagination" by Maroon 5, Franz Ferdinand, and "Perfect Situations" by Weezer.

And I finally finished the second book.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter! Duh!

WARNING: Some references to Potter Puppet Pals. Oh, and if you're wondering why I have titles for each segment, I got it from Halo. Don't make fun of me.

-.-.-.-.-

Chapter Two: 10 Points for Professor Snape!

"Professor Snape! Your robe's on fire!" Lara screamed. Snape hastily fell to the floor and started rolling. Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs laughed hysterically, by the Slytherins only glared at their laughter. Snape soon realized that he was not on fire, and quickly stood up, brushing off the dust.

"Minus 10 points to Gryffindor! Minus five to anyone else who laughed!" Snape glared at Lara. Gryffindors no longer cared about their house points. No one minded a little sabotage either. Eventually, the Slytherins would laugh.

Everyone went back to putting nonsensical items into their cauldrons. Twiggy did well in this class, only because he was a master at taking notes, and following directions. Snape seemed to favor him and Draco the most. Harry often got the rap for foolish things. No one ever retorted when Snape acted unfairly. After a few days of class, Caspian started to attend and help around the class.

"What is a third year doing here?" Harry leaned over to Ron.

"She's a TA, teacher's assistant. You can get extra house points if you assist a teacher for a semester. But I'm curious. Usually, Snape only picks Slytherins as assistants, and she's a Gryffindor, isn't she?" Ron asked. Harry nodded, remembering that she sits at their table to eat.

Twiggy slightly smiled during the potions class, now that Caspian was there. But he soon found out that she wasn't at all there to help. She was there to cause havoc.

"Class, this is the new TA, Caspian Clinton," He quickly introduced her.

"Hey, Severus! How's it hangin'?" She carried a spray bottle. Everyone wondered what it was for, since it looked very Muggle-like.

"Miss Clinton, why do you have that here?" Snape seemed miffed that she used his first name. She pointed the nozzle at him and sprayed. He flinched and let out a high pitched squeal.

"Don't worry, it's only water," She admitted. Every first year starred at her, wondering what had just gone through her mind. She looked at them. Silence loomed in the air for a few moments, when Neville started to clap loudly. Harry and Ron followed, as did everyone else except the Slytherins and Hermione. Snape stood up straight and straightened his robe.

"Harry Potter! I hate your face! Minus 20 points to Gryffindor!" Snape pointed at Harry and shouted. Caspian looked puzzlingly at Snape. Harry and most of the first year members of Gryffindor groaned collectively. Everyone knew Snape hated Harry, and they all knew the loss of points really wasn't his fault.

Snape looked around his gloomy classroom. Hermione sat up straight, ready for any questions. Snape looked at Lawrence, whom was looking down into his lap. He seemed preoccupied with something. Snape, with one long movement, ripped his wand from his belt and pointed it at Lawrence pensively. Lawrence flew backwards off of his chair and landed on the ground. Little cards flew everywhere. Snape quickly walked over to see what the cards were. A whole collection of chocolate frog cards were strewn all over the floor. Snape picked them up, Agrippa, Dumbledore, Merlin, Ptolemy, Alberic Grunnion, and Circe, and in one hand. He went back to the front of the class just as Lawrence sat back down in his chair. With a flick of his wand, the cards went up in flames. Lawrence's jaw dropped. Draco and other Slytherins snickered at his misfortune. Lawrence glared at Draco.

Once the cards were a pile of ash, Snape went back to demonstrating a decent heal potion. He put his head over Seamus' cauldron just as it exploded. He writhered around while Caspian skipped over to him with a glass full of what she thought was water.

No more than 5 minutes later, the classmates were watching as Snape was being taken to the hospital wing. Caspian stood in front.

"Everyone take your seats! Instead of continuing with the lesson, you may use this time as a study hall! Everybody get to work!" Caspian smiled, as if Snape was just absent with a cold or something trivial. She went to his desk and propped her feet, covered in adorning leather boots, up on the desk, which had brewing potions and dark arts notes strewn about. She picked up a piece of parchment and a quill and wrote in messy letters "Send a substitute down, please!-TA". Caspian rolled the small parchment and tied it. Caspian handed it off to Snape's crow (mistakenly named Fru Fru) and the crow flew off to Dumbledore's quarters.

Less than ten minutes later, a strange man stood at the door of the classroom, looking at Caspian, the TA, whom was busily redecorating. Most of the Slytherin insignia had been taken down, and was now lying precariously on the floor. In place of it, was Gryffindor. The Slytherin first years would've protested, if they hadn't seen Snape being taken out of the room in a stretcher.

Besides the Slytherin insignia, all of Snape's foul looking feather quills were replaced with Peacock ones, and his desk materials were now purple and pink. Caspian was now in the middle of a spell to turn Severus' desk pink, but the man in the doorway quickly entered upon seeing this.

"What is going on?" He asked and Caspian's head turned quickly towards him. She breathed a sigh of relief when she found that it wasn't Snape or Filch. It was a strange looking man, who wasn't dressed like the other teachers at all. He wore strange leather combat boots and arm and leg guards. He was dressed more like a swordsman than a teacher. And behind his was a beautiful silver rapier hanging by his hip. The stern look on his face and the quick pace he was walking at scared Caspian and she fell to the floor in a worship position.

"We're not worthy! We're not worthy!" She blurted out. Several students laughed at her tone of voice, but the strange man in the middle of the room did not. She looked up at him and found him to be even more stern looking. He turned around to face the class.

"I'm your new teacher for a few days. My name is Mr. Monarski. What were you working on before your teacher became incapacitated?" Mr. Monarski bellowed. Hermione gingerly raised her hand. He looked at her.

"Yes?"

"Um. . . Heal potions, sir."

"Right."

Mr. Monarski watched the action from a far while the first years attempted the potion. Caspian watched him closely, pondering her next move. She steepled her fingers and sat on a stool next to Snape's desk. Mr. Monarski stood there without fidgeting, just scratching his beard. Caspian walked over to him.

"You know, the real Snape would be peering over the students cauldrons right now," Caspian said slyly. The man didn't move.

"I'm not Snape," He said shortly. She paused for a few moments.

"You know, the real Snape would be taking points off of Gryffindor because Harry Potter is picking his nose right now," Caspian giggled to herself. His head turned slowly, and he glared at her. She shrunk back and sat on the stool once again.

-.-.-.-.-

**Retort**

George and Fred watched the new teacher sit up at the High Table and eat dinner with the normal teachers. Fred poked Ron.

"What?" He asked, semi-agitatedly.

"Who is that man? The one sitting next to Professor Quirrel?" Fred asked. Ron put his roll down.

"The substitute for Snape," Ron replied shortly.

"Wow. We got off lucky for a few days," George smiled. Harry grimaced.

"Not really. He seems just as mean. But at least he doesn't favor one house over the other," Ron replied. Hermione sat up straight.

"I like him. He reminds me of my father," Hermione spoke in an arrogant tone. Ron shot her a look of disbelief.

"You father?" He asked. She nodded and frowned. Harry stood up with a goblet in hand.

"We should have a toast! To Seamus, for being in the right place at the right time!" Harry said and the rest of the Gryffindor table stood up and put their glasses in the air. Seamus took a bow. Caspian waved her goblet in the air, spilling a little.

"And ten points to Professor Snape! For getting blown up!" Caspian shouted. The Gryffindors took a drink, and some Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw that overheard, drank to it too. Malfoy stood up at the Slytherin table.

"Oh shut up! Harry Potter smells!" Draco shouted jealously.

"And ten points to Draco, for acting like a dumbass!" Percy shouted. Some people shouted a "yay" to that. Twiggy, feeling rather secluded, secretly drank to their toast, wishing he could enjoy their good cheer. He disliked his house extremely. His dinners were never full of good cheer.

Goyle and Vincent pulled the rolls out of the wooden bowl and filled it with food they were served. Vincent pulled out a tube of toothpaste from his pocket and squeezed it in. Goyle mixed in a collection of booger flavored Bertie bots and some worms to the mix. Soon, it looked like one big bowl of cesspool. Malfoy scooped some up with his hand and raised it for all to see.

"To Slytherins!" Draco shouted and took a bite out of the goop. Fellus, a fifth year, laughed sadistically at the sight of the initiation ceremony of the Slytherin house. Several third years kept stirring the bowl, making it a sludge of brown and white substance. Twiggy was afraid to be made fun of if he didn't partake in the disgusting first step of Slytherinhood. He didn't want to be a Slytherin, but he had no choice. Fellus noticed Twiggy's lack of interest, like the other first years. He leaned over and had a sly look on his face.

"Come on . . . Twiggy," Fellus pushed the bowl towards him, intimidating poor twiggy. "Dig in."

Twiggy knew this was not the time to back down and act secluded. Twiggy had no intention of becoming friends with the Slytherins, but he wasn't going to let them think he was against them either. Twiggy fearlessly grabbed a handful of gooey mess, and quickly put it into his mouth. Fellus smirked.

-.-.-.-.-

**What Is Said in the Slytherin House, Stays in the Slytherin House**

Twiggy hated the Slytherin living quarters. He slept across from Malfoy and hated it. The initiation ceremonies were ghastly, and believed that no other house was as dreadful as this one. Twiggy resolved this problem by putting on an intimidating face so that he wouldn't be picked on because of his size. Malfoy wasn't much bigger than he was, but at least Malfoy had goons, Crabbe and Goyle.

Several boys had a magic duel in the quarters late at night, and all four of them had injuries that were gruesome. Twiggy took no part of it, but Titus had insisted on showing him his half charred leg. Twiggy was disgusted.

"So . . . Twiggy, were your parents both wizards?" Draco asked snidely, sitting up in bed, pretending to read a Dark Arts book. Twiggy shifted.

"Yes. My father was on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. My mother graduated at the top of her class," Twiggy said truthfully. But Draco's snide remarks about mud bloods made his blood boil, since it wasn't something anyone had control over. Draco remained silent for a few moments.

"Are you planning on learning the Dark Arts?" Draco asked. Twiggy nodded a lie. What kind of Slytherin would he be if he didn't? Draco narrowed his eyes as Twiggy had nodded.

"Good," He replied. Draco paused again. Twiggy had hoped that was the last of the questions. But Draco spoke again.

"Have you ever seen a grown man naked?" He asked. Twiggy slowly turned his head to look at Draco. Twiggy got out of bed and backed up into the common room.

-.-.-.-.-.-

**Potion Master**

Mr. Monarski paced around the room, searching for the slightest mistake. Lawrence eyed his carefully, and then wondered if the man had a wand. He looked at the rapier and wondered if it was against the rules to carry it around.

Caspian continued to make herself comfortable at Snape's desk, knowing he would be returning within the next day. She had bought a Muggle item called Post-it notes, and proceeded to label everything on his desk. Mr. Monarski stopped yelling at her, because there was no point in it. The Gryffindor house had a grand total of 4 points, while the other houses were well on their way to a hundred.

"Alright class, class is dismissed," Mr. Monarski announced and the students picked up their books and left. Caspian carefully made sure that Mr. Monarski did not notice that she didn't leave, but was hiding under Snape's desk. He left the room quickly, probably to go to the bathroom, and she quickly got out and grabbed some of Snape's supplies to make a potion of her own. She stuffed the ingredients into her messenger bag and left quickly, hoping to go unseen.

-.-.-.-.-

**The Actual J.K. Rowling Harry Potter**

"Hey, Ron, want to go make fun of Hermione?" Harry asked as they walked down the hallway. Ron's face lit up.

"Sure! And after that, would you like to go with me to the restricted section with George and Fred?" Ron exclaimed enthusiastically.

"Yes! That would be delightful!" Harry gave him a thumbs up. They both beamed and skipped off.

Neville, Lara, Hermione, Lawrence, and Seamus all stood there, watching the two boys skip off together in ignorant bliss. Their jaws were dropped, and they all shared the same wonder; what had possibly gotten into their heads?

"I need new friends," Neville gasped. The others nodded. From a few yards down the hall, they all heard a strange phenomenon.

"I love magic!" Harry skipped. Ron smiled.

"I love you, Harry!" Ron chirped. They both continued. Ron and Harry skipped down the hall in utter bliss, not knowing that their friends seriously considered their fleeting mental health. All of a sudden, Snape appeared before the two boys.

"Oh no!" Ron gasped sardonically. "It's evil Professor Snape, the Potions Master! Come to reign terror upon the first years! The end is nigh! Repent, repent!" He yelled. Snape put his fists on his hips, to be all the more intimidating.

"Harry Potter! Minus ten points to Gryffindor for looking like a bafoon!" Snape snarled. Ron kicked Snape in the shins.

"Minus ten points to Gryffindor for Harry Potter's friend kicking a teacher!"

Ron tackled Snape.

"Get off me!" Ron got off, but he then started to poke Snape, saying, "Bother bother bother bother bother bother bother!"

"Stop that! Stop it! Get off! Stop!" Snape said under his breath and shooed Ron away.

"Minus twenty points to Gryffindor for Harry Potter being born!" Snape yelled. Ron and Harry then stood there, as if the strange illusion of Rowling had gone.

"That's not fair! He couldn't not be born!" Ron fought. Dumbledore magically appeared next to Snape.

"Nope! It's fair! Teacher's call!" Dumbledore disappeared again. Snape smiled evilly.

"I am Snape, the Potions Master!" he declared. Ron and Harry quirked an eyebrow at him, but not because what he said. Caspian was behind him, and had just said "Pinkus Lavaticus" and turned Snape's robe and clothing day glow pink. Snape looked down at himself, and the color immediately blinded him. He rolled around on the ground, covering his eyes. Harry and Ron smiled at Caspian, and then ran off before Snape could deduct points at their expense. Professor Flitwick had just been passing by when he found a fourth year girl standing over someone who looked strikingly like Snape, but had a hideous looking robe on. He walked over to the man on the ground, and found that it was, indeed, Snape.

"Wow," Flitwick said. Caspian smiled triumphantly.


End file.
